Zolo Blowpro Auto-Stroking Realistic Blow Job Male Masturbator

I was sent this for free to review, which I was very excited about because I've always wanted one of these fancy blowjob machines. Unfortunately this was quite a letdown.

The good:

The packaging this comes in is high quality, a sturdy box with a hinged flap that opens to reveal the Blowpro and a smaller box that slides out containing the 3 silicone cock rings and the instructions. The travel case is a good quality bag with a sturdy drawstring to keep it closed and a soft lining inside to keep the Blowpro safe from any damage.

The material the toy is made out of feels good quality. The plastic is sturdy and the sleeve is soft and smooth. The remote has a good length of wire that isn't too short and not so long that the cable is a nuisance. The buttons on the remote are easy to press and have a nice "click" to them.

The bad:

The first thing you'll notice when turning the toy on is the noise. This machine is LOUD. Luckily the travel case doubles as a muffler that you can put over the top when using it, which helps a little, but even that doesn't stop the mechanical screaming that this thing makes from filling the room.

The fact that this eats four AA batteries is honestly outrageous. At ninety Great British pounds you would expect it to be USB rechargeable, but no that would be too nice.

Cleaning this toy should be easy. Just take the sleeve out and wash it in the sink, right? No. The instructions explicitly say in all caps "SLEEVE NOT REMOVABLE". Why it would be made this way is mind-boggling because it means you have to put the whole thing under the tap to clean it, which is not often a good idea with electronics, especially when the bloody thing isn't even air tight! Water is able to get in between the sleeve and the plastic casing, making a nice pool of water on the inside you have to try and get out. Except you can't get it all out because the water droplets stick to the inside wall of the toy. Leaving the toy in a warm place should dry it out though? Absolutely freaking not. All that ends up doing is causing the whole of the inside to get steamed up, ruining the transparent aesthetic.

Luckily (despite multiple attempts) I've only ever had to clean a bit of lube out of it because the feeling is so pathetic that it fails to bring me to orgasm. Does it feel bad? No, Does it feel good? Barely. It most certainly does not feel like a realistic blow job despite what the title may say.

The ugly truth:

This thing a bad. If it cost closer to £20 I may have been a bit more lenient on it, but at £90 it is 100% not worth buying. If you are looking for something different from an ordinary stroker then here are my recommendations that I have enjoyed instead of this awful Blowpro:

Desire Luxury Male Vibrator - £80

Smile Warming Blow Job Male Masturbator - £75

Literally any wand vibrator - £15 to £150

Lovehoney Hummer Deluxe Wand Attachment - £20

And there are many more to choose from.

The only reason I can fathom to recommend this to someone is if you have a fetish for robots and the sound of motors is a kink of yours, otherwise this is not worth the money.

I was sent this free to write an honest review on it.

The good part...

This Blopro came as expected it on time and the discreet packaging as always. It was very heavy and we was excited to try it out. So we tore the box open and came across a nice boxed product. It looked fun from the box. We unpacked it and got it all set up with new batteries ready for a weekend of fun. It looked good when out of the box. The material it is made from felt high quality and the sleeve inside felt good quality. No problems with the look or packaging of this item. It all packs away nicely. The wire on the control is a good length and the control is easy to use.

The bad points:

When turning the machine on it is very loud. It’s not the normal vibratory sound but a horrible loud noise. You can hide the noise a bit by putting the travel case over it. That dulls the sound a bit but not a great deal and the noise alone is very off putting.

If you have a large penis or a wife girth I don’t think it would be any use. We lubed it up well and gave it a go. After fiddling around and finally getting comfortable it didn’t give any exciting feelings where it should. The droning noise is a big problem. After a while I gave up very dissatisfied. A few days later we got it out again to give it another go, but again no pleasure from it.

Cleaning it was a major chore. The sleeve doesn’t come off and makes it harder to clean out. I found using a bottle brush was the best way to clean it out. Even though it never had the desired effect, it still needed to be cleaned out after using the lube.

It’s a very expensive item and I would expect it to be really good. But unfortunately this just didn’t do the job. If it worked well then it would be worth the money. But as it didn’t do anything for me I felt it is a lot of money for something that doesn’t get you off.

A blowjob machine is a good ideal as long as it does this job and ain't loud like this. It was definitely worth a try and I’ll continue looking for the right blowjob toy.

Have to agree with all the reviews - the idea is great in principle but the reality is just so disappointing!

For a start the Blowpro is huge and heavy - surely it doesn't need to be this big?! And it needs four actual batteries for a total of 2 hours usage time - not that anyone will actually use it enough to test that claim anyway!

Once you turn it on, I would say it is loud but what I found really off-putting was the noise itself; this isn't a simple hum like you would get from a vibrator - it's more like an industrial machine grinding parts!

And for all that song and dance you might as well be putting your penis into a sack - the sleeve is short so you can't really get good penetration and I think the moving parts are just there for show - they just go up and down outside the sleeve, offering no sensation whatsoever!

I gave up after two minutes and went back to the instructions just in case I was doing something wrong!

Besides the nice box it comes in, the only other highlight is the manual - or more specifically the troubleshooting guide which seems to mainly suggest your penis is the problem - not the machine!

I would so love someone to invent a good auto-stroker but until then I will stick with my Tenga Zero!